The Lies of Carly Smithson

Posted by thefunnystone on March 11th, 2008 at 1:51 PM
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Carly Smithson is a liar. And a really bad one at that. Ever since we broke the story that she would be on the show this year, we knew something was off with her. And it seems that it's not just something, it's everything. The girl can barely keep her lies straight. Just in case you feel bad for her lame sob stories or feel compelled to vote for her, step away from the telephone. Read on and find out how absolutely nothing said by this lying plant, who only got on the show due to working with Randy Jackson years ago at MCA records, is the truth. We'll also keep this updated with new lies as Carly weaves a tangled web of lame falsities.

(Last Updated on 3/11/08)

 

LIE #1: "My name is Carly Smithson."

No, it's not. Your name is Carly Hennessy. Sure, Carly married Todd Smithson 2 years ago. But she oh so conveniently changed her name only a few months ago for the show. When JoesPlace revealed spoilers for this season, Carly's name was revealed as Carly Hennessy, because that's how she was known in Hollywood. She was even playing shows as late as November of last year under her maiden name. So why suddenly change it? Because, of course, she was trying to hide her past. Like everything else she does though, Carly did it incredibly poorly.

 

LIE #2: "My record company imploded."

Carly was a colossal flop in 2001. Her record "Ultimate High" tanked miserably. Even in 2002, when anyone with common sense knew that no one wanted to buy Carly's failed album, MCA Records still tried to promote Carly in Europe unsuccessfully. MCA merged with Geffen Records in 2003. Successful and talented artists like Mary J. Blige, Common, Blink-182, and the Roots made an easy transition over to the new label. So where did Carly go? She was dumped long before the merger in 2002. So her record company never imploded, and even if id had, the company merged and dissolved a full year after Carly was given the old heave-ho. Artists on Geffen still recorded successful albums. Carly even claims on the official Idol site that her friends would be shocked to learn she owns a Blink-182 album. So Carly even knows some bands survived the so-called implosion that never existed.

 

LIE #3: "I made a record, but I never did stage performances at all."

Carly told Zap2It that she may have had a record deal, but she never performed on the stage, so she's at a disadvantage too. This is one of the stupidest lies she's ever told, as she has a ton of stage experience. First, she toured in Les Miserables as one of the leads when she was 9. She performed at the WKRZ 20th Anniversary Show, then a series of 5 shows around the country to promote her horrible single, at a concert in 2002 for over 100,000 people in Dublin, even still performing as late as 2006 and 2007. And those are just the ones we can find proof of. This lie makes even less sense than the others!

 

 

LIE #4: "We can pick any song we want on American Idol."

In the semifinals, this year the contestants were limited to choosing from a list of about 50 songs each week, which is why they all chose such idiotic songs. And Garrett Haley mentioned that the contestants are asked to pick 3 songs from the list and then are at the mercy of the producers deciding which they can sing. So to counteract this, Carly says in an Entertainment Weekly interview: “They're all saying online that we have a list to pick from. I believe we had a list in Hollywood week, and it was a big list; we had a lot of songs to choose from. But since the live shows have started, we get to choose whatever we like, which is great.” Why are we saying this online? Because Garett acknowledged it, and Nigel Lythgoe, the executive producer of Idol, even acknowledged it here. Silly Carly can’t even keep up the lie, completely contradicting the other contestants in the interview who say they have to pick from a list. It doesn’t even benefit her to make this up, as she looks foolish contradicting the producer.

 

LIE #5: "My record failed because of 9/11."

As if her lies weren’t ridiculous enough, Carly has the audacity to blame her failure on the terrorist attacks of 9/11. “It was gaining traction, she said, but then 9/11 happened and “nobody was interested in shopping a new record.” Sure, 9/11 killed your record. “I’m Gonna Blow Your Mind” was released as a single in early 2001. It failed due to because no one wanted to hear an 18 year old sing about blow jobs. Then, 9/11 happened, and “Beautiful You” was offered up as the second single in November 2001. So the record company didn’t ditch her at all. In fact, they released a second song, shortly after 9/11 to try to help promote her. Her album was then released on November 13, 2001, a full 2 months after 9/11, and it still didn’t sell. As a comparison, crappy rockers Nickelback actually released their album on 9/11. Their music is worse than Carly’s, yet it sold relatively well, and they had a #1 hit by the end of the year with “How You Remind Me.” Looks like 9/11 didn’t hurt that new artist’s career.

 

LIE #6: "This is my second chance."

It's more like her 500th chance. This girl has been trying to become famous since she was little. Her mom was even a celebrity. "[My mom] was one of Ireland's top models so when I was born all the photographers wanted to take pictures of me. I grew up and got to go to work with her so all the photographers knew me. Auditions would come for different advertisements and the photographers would say, "Oh, we'll just use Carly." It was insane; I'd be on four commercials at a time around Dublin. So I was very well known growing up." Chance one. Singing in Les Miserables and having a record come out at age 9. Chance two. Her album "Ultimate High". Chance three. Trying out for American Idol two seasons ago. Chance four. Trying out again. Chance five. How many chances does someone get? No one wanted to hear her the last four times, why should chance five be any different?

 

So you see, Carly is not just a Sanjaya-hating loser. She's a liar. A really big one. If you feel compelled to vote for her, don't bother. I'm sure she's blowing Nigel Lythgoe's "mind" as we speak and she's in no danger of leaving the competition. But one day, this plant will wilt again, as history shows it always has, and it will be pretty funny to see the reactions. We'll see what kind of lies Carly will come up with then!

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sjb12
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 11:45am
Joined: 12 Mar 2008

I thought I saw Carly, and only Carly, lip synching last night. Am I the only one? Have I been infected with the rampant paranoia that there is nothing they won't do to push the Plant on us? Is it even possible that they could do that? Maybe it was just her weird facial expressions but her lips were not matching her sounds, I swear I saw it. Then again, she does look like an evil robot most weeks.

Julesb2183
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 11:48am
Joined: 06 Jan 2008

Hmmmm. I just read something interesting. I think all the tcos get special consideration in their song selection. They will convieniantly put their "favorite" songs in the list of oh, about 50, from them to chose from. (like Crazy On You)

jen070584
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 12:54pm
Joined: 26 Feb 2008

Baah! What a freakin' liar! Here's a link to her music video... that's right, music video, that she made when she was signed with Geffen. It was one of her two singles off her album that only sold 300 copies. I actually kind of feel sorry for her... NOT! What a lying tool.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQSxV6jgRWw

WR Higgins
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 1:07pm
Joined: 12 Mar 2008

What is that thing she does with her brow when she hits a high note?

I swear, it looks like she's friggin' shape-shifting or something!

jen070584
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 1:13pm
Joined: 26 Feb 2008

It seems Carly isn't our only little lying idol this year:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EdgFFbmedHE&feature=related

Nonowili
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 1:17pm
Joined: 12 Mar 2008

Great Job, Dave. Besides the creepy tattoos on her arm, she is robotic and she has that mega crease on her forhead when she shouts, er, sings. I'm all for second chances, but she needs to move on.

tigger70
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 1:28pm
Joined: 07 Mar 2008

Member Since Jan 2006 Last Login 1/30/2006
Name: jeff archuleta
Site: http://www.loopwise.com/archjazz
Company: arch music group
Email: - Send Email to this member -
Location: SLC, Utah United States
Hometown: Salt Lake City
Occupation: musician/producer/promoter Computer/hitech hardware sales and consulting
Main Instruments: Vocals; Horns
Areas of Expertise: Jazz
Vocals
Funk
Rock
Horns
Gospel
Reggae
Hip Hop
Ambient
Urban
New Age
Easy Listening
Pop
Blues
Latin

Average Pricing: US$/Hour
Profile: Experienced producer, consultant, vocal consultant, arranging, style and image development. We are looking for pop/r&b/singers and well as songwriters. We are constantly looking for songs for our artists. We have also spent the last 5 years working with American Idol and Star Search performers as well as young up and coming singers and songwriters who want to compete in the top 40 arena. One of our artists was a $100,000 winner on Star Search. We are interested in finding great songs for our existing artists as well as finding new artists who need someone to get their music exposed to people in the recording industry. We have excellent contacts with record labels, top entertainment attorneys, as well as some of the leading producers. We accept material from artists but prefer you send us 2-3 songs with your resume via email first for evaluation.

Age: 44
Gender: Male
Interested in Meeting People for: Musicians
Status: Married
Favorite Music: jazz, good pop/r&b great vocalists - all styles
Favorite Books:
Favorite TV Shows:
Favorite Movies:
Who I want to Meet: Quality musicians, talented songwriters who need a vehicle for their songs

seems to me the whole show is full of lying bastards, and lying fathers...did you know he threatened other contestants on Star Search and was banned from the set?

Rusty
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 2:13pm
Joined: 12 Mar 2008

How exactly was Nickelback a "new artist" in 2001? That was five years after its first studio album and the song mentioned is off of its third studio album. Is a five-year-old band the newest artist that had success after 9/11? I am not saying her excuse isn't bad, just that the evidence used to support your assertion is.

GSundheim
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 2:21pm
Joined: 26 Jan 2008

Dave, this was brilliant, on your part. I agree with those who perceive something negative in this woman's personality coming through, somehow. I don't think she's a bad singer. But there's something icy and off-putting about her, otherwise -- as if her narcissism is so overwhelming, she can't even mask it when she's on stage, trying to bring an audience into the performance with her.

I do hope the "Irish need not apply" comment above was just directed at the Irish woman so cleverly exposed as a fraud (again) in this article. Some of us are overloaded with Irish genes and could take offense, otherwise.

KD30
Posted: March 12, 2008 - 3:02pm
Joined: 27 Feb 2008

When I try to get into that link it doesnt work, have they taken it down? Also, how do you know about the star search stuff? I would love to read about that, threatening children? How can you call yourself a human Mr Archuleta?

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