Catch Your Breath, Gaspy... You're the New VFTW Pick!

Posted by thefunnystone on May 8th, 2008 at 4:12 PM
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We've gotten tons of letters saying that David Archuleta better not win American Idol. He's annoying, he can barely form a coherent sentence without gasping for air and laughing nervously, he sings the same thing every week while getting more nervous, he forgets the words on a regular basis, and he's controlled by his obnoxious stage dad. So wait... that makes him the worst. Hey, there we go! Obviously less talented and less marketable than Syesha and David Cook, Gaspy is the new VFTW pick! Sure he's annoying, but that's why he's perfect. Most of America does not want him to win. Imagine an Idol winner who couldn't aspire to be much more than a less-talented Clay Aiken. Imagine an Idol winner whose press tour would take 20 minutes to answer a single question. And just imagine the type of sappy ballad that the producers already have lined up for David to record, dripping with extra cheese and terrible melisma. We smell failure! Hopefully this won't get him locked in his cage for another night. Break free, Gaspy. Break free. As an added bonus, if you sing Lil Mama's "Lip Gloss" this week, we'll love you forever. Who's working the strings now? Daddy? The producers? Or VFTW?
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o_o
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 6:49pm
Joined: 11 Mar 2007

I love it. But where is the inhaler Deb asked for?

Bestoftheworst - We can't pick Syesha, as she doesn't suck, and she's going home for sure next week. Therefore everyone would say we are powerless "loosers". Gaspy won't win, anyway.

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andrea-19
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 6:50pm
Joined: 28 Mar 2008

Good job guys!! Archie needs all the votes he can get! David Archuleta FTW.

Mysterioso
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 6:50pm
Joined: 18 Apr 2007

This is going to be hilarious, whether he wins or loses.
If he wins he will be the WORST Idol ever. At last we can laugh a bit more and not just be disgusted with him.

Hi Stage Daddy! Fuck you!

Hayley781
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 6:53pm
Joined: 08 May 2008

Actually, you couldn't more off about my age. Not that it's any of your business. He's clearly one of the most talented. The judges, the producers, and anyone with half a brain knows that.

I'm not a Morman, but I think it's incredibly rude and petty to pick on a religion.

The haters need to shut up. They're just making themselves look more ridiculous.

JohnnyDrama
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 6:56pm
Joined: 09 Mar 2008

Haley?? Let go!! Archie is now OURS and we shall treat him well... we promise!!! Wa----Haaaaaaaa *evil laugh*

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Waiting to make David Gee my bitch!

LB987
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 7:01pm
Joined: 01 May 2008

"It's kinda sad that we gotta pick this bastard"

Wow , Its truly amazing what all you 'adults' are saying about this amazingly talented 17 year old boy. Hes still in High School for god sakes and hes more mature then you are. No , Im not one of those screaming fan girls , I watch the show for the entertainment and I dont particualry have a favorite.
Last time I checked this was a singing competition..? But okay if bashing him because hes a happy , humble , down to earth kid gets your blood pumping then whatever. I'd LOVE to stick you up on a stage to sing in front of millions world wide, Im sure you'd be totally calm, not even one bitt nervous right? Even at the age of 17 hes probably doing better then you ever would. Hes only human , he gets nervous just like EVERYONE else. So let it go..
You are all judging him on his personality ( an amazing one at that) and not his voice , which once agian , is amazing. David Archuleta is untouchable , so good luck trying to bring him down. He should win the entire thing based on talent alone , but assholes like you people amaze me .. no really you do. How could you ever hate him so much to say these things about him , and trying to stop a seventeen year old from having their dreams come true , as cheesy as that sounds , but its the facts.

Oh and that banner thing that you have... haha.. its not funny. That joke about his dad ? It was over used and has already been adressed as being untrue many of times. If all you can find wrong with him is that fact that his dad had untrue rumours spread about him and the fact that he "gasps" becuase he had a paralyzed vocal cord is just sad. Way to make fun of a problem he has? No really.. way to go? I dont really care anymore that hes up here as Vote for the Worst , thanks for casting more votes for him . I never used to vote but now that you've all said these things , just make me want to vote for him harder everyweek. He truly deserves to win , and not have to deal with this crap from you people. Thanks for inspiring me:)

nonidol
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 7:09pm
Joined: 26 Mar 2008

So Gaspy is our new toy? The reasons are logical and the tweentards will have kittens! LOL. The poor boy can hardly handle a 1 hour show(where he appears less than 15 minutes, let alone a 60-90 minute concert. We will see who the producers "target" next week and if they will be as harsh as skunk weed (like they were with Jason).

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Looking forward to dream crushing

Hayley781
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 7:02pm
Joined: 08 May 2008

Please, if he wins it'll be because he's truly talented and deserves it. The only reason VFTW picked him is because they know Syesha already has a huge chance at leaving next week.

Libby
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 7:06pm
Joined: 07 Mar 2008

So, the purpose this website serves is to mess up the show and make the producers mad, right? Then, why'd you pick David Archuleta. You do realize that the producers like David Archuleta and wouldn't be upset if he was the new American Idol. Ultimately, there is going to be a winner and you guys are actually siding with the producers this year. Nice-- clever work!

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Libbers

MissManaged
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 7:13pm
Joined: 29 Mar 2008

"Wow , Its truly amazing what all you 'adults' are saying about this amazingly talented 17 year old boy."

Oh so you can't talk about Archie because he's just a "boy" and you can't say anything about Syesha because she's black. Is it acceptable to you to say anything wrong about the white guy? Damn!

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“Imagination and fiction make up more than three quarters of our real life.”
Simone Weil