Catch Your Breath, Gaspy... You're the New VFTW Pick!

Posted by thefunnystone on May 8th, 2008 at 4:12 PM
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We've gotten tons of letters saying that David Archuleta better not win American Idol. He's annoying, he can barely form a coherent sentence without gasping for air and laughing nervously, he sings the same thing every week while getting more nervous, he forgets the words on a regular basis, and he's controlled by his obnoxious stage dad. So wait... that makes him the worst. Hey, there we go! Obviously less talented and less marketable than Syesha and David Cook, Gaspy is the new VFTW pick! Sure he's annoying, but that's why he's perfect. Most of America does not want him to win. Imagine an Idol winner who couldn't aspire to be much more than a less-talented Clay Aiken. Imagine an Idol winner whose press tour would take 20 minutes to answer a single question. And just imagine the type of sappy ballad that the producers already have lined up for David to record, dripping with extra cheese and terrible melisma. We smell failure! Hopefully this won't get him locked in his cage for another night. Break free, Gaspy. Break free. As an added bonus, if you sing Lil Mama's "Lip Gloss" this week, we'll love you forever. Who's working the strings now? Daddy? The producers? Or VFTW?
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xue
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:07pm
Joined: 08 May 2008

fuck you vote for the worsters.. go to hell. leave archuleta alone..

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passtheforbidde...
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:07pm
Joined: 13 Mar 2008

LB987: Having such poor grammar and spelling in your posts really damages the effectiveness of your ideas. Have you never had a teacher point that out to you? Perhaps you are just rushing too much and are not taking time to proofread (you should really consider doing that, however). In your 10:56 post, which was just over 4 lines long, you had 21 typos by my count, to say nothing about the run-on sentences. At first I though no one had introduced you to the concept of apostrophes, but they you had one in the third line. For future reference, "your" is not the same as "you're"...please try to use them correctly.

Samara: For the record, I am not male, though I am between 20 & 40 years of age. And I do not fancy Lil' Davey...I prefer straight guys...who have a confident personality.

xue
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:08pm
Joined: 08 May 2008

fuck you vote for the worsters.. leave archuleta alone... go to hell

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Tealover
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:09pm
Joined: 08 May 2008

Passthe- whatever,

Clever comeback- clearly if you can't defend by logic, go for grammar. Brilliant.

warden
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:09pm
Joined: 19 Apr 2008

"Quite honestly, I feel bad for you or anyone who has not experienced what we fans experience every time he sings. I've certainly never felt that emotion with any other singer before, and my greatest wish is that everyone can experience that just once in their life. I hope you can learn to open your heart at some point so that maybe you can feel it too."

Pedaphelia?

I listen to hoards of music in tons of genres. I go to tons of concerts (actual concerts, not American Idol watered down talent shows). I don't need to be told about "feeling" anything.

lol.. just sad that a dorky 15 year old who you've heard sing maybe 20-30 times has had such an impact on you. I'd be willing to be your life is as dull as his personality.

xue
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:12pm
Joined: 08 May 2008

honestly VTFW.. what do you get when you're doing this horrible things? you're just hurting their feelings.. i think you should be sensitive enough... stop this...

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Samara
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:13pm
Joined: 08 May 2008

"lol.. just sad that a dorky 15 year old who you've heard sing maybe 20-30 times has had such an impact on you. I'd be willing to be your life is as dull as his personality."

LAAAAWL... it's sad that you're a serious member of this site. Your life must be as dull and meager as your intelligence quotient.

Oh my! I've stopped being semi-polite. I guess this site just brings out the WORST in us...

cc64keys
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:16pm
Joined: 27 Feb 2008

Imagine if we could beat David Cook out of the Top 3. One less pompous "rock artist" the world will have to deal with.

Scott Baio
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:15pm
Joined: 05 Mar 2008

xue wrote:
honestly VTFW.. what do you get when you're doing this horrible things? you're just hurting their feelings.. i think you should be sensitive enough... stop this...

Ah, I see we have a visitor from across the sea! Welcome! Tell me, what is your first language?

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Tealover
Posted: May 8, 2008 - 9:16pm
Joined: 08 May 2008

"Warden,"

People have the right to be moved by whatever type of music appeals to them, and for some, DA's pure voice is a beautiful thing. Should you understand/agree? Who cares- but labeling someone a pedophile- what an ass you must be. Clearly we know where your mind is ("Warden" is your handle? Wonder what part of prison life appeals to you... showers maybe? Sounds a bit pervy to me)