All You Need to Know About New Idol Judge Kara DioGuardi

Posted by thefunnystone on January 12th, 2009 at 9:06 AM
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Just joining us for American Idol season 8? Just hearing about new judge Kara DioGuardi? Well, don't hold your breath hoping for an amazing songwriter to give opinions. While we're excited that we'll now have another judge with a coherent opinion (Paula and Randy clearly do not), Kara will be judging the Idol singers after having written songs such as:

Katharine McPhee - "Open Toes"
Almost every awful Ashlee Simpson song
Most of Kelly Osbourne's album
Lindsay Lohan - "Confessions of a Broken Heart" (and 15 other songs by her)
Paris Hilton - "I Want You", "Jealousy", "Screwed"
Pussycat Dolls - "Beep", "I Don't Need a Man"
Hilary Duff - "With Love", "Come Clean"
Gwen Stefani - "Rich Girl"
Britney Spears - "Ooh Ooh Baby", "Heaven on Earth"
Bo Bice - "The Real Thing"
Clay Aiken - "The Way"
David Archuleta - "To Be With You"
Ali Lohan's upcoming album

Simply terrible! So this woman is one of the reasons pop radio is unlistenable. Blame accordingly. She is also the co-owner of Arthouse Entertainment, which was produced crap like Jim Jones's "We Fly High", Nick Lachey's "What's Left of Me", and David Archuleta's "Crush". Why in the world would you pay her, knowing that she's been involved with so much awfulness?

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insaneinthesfv
Posted: January 13, 2009 - 2:36pm
Joined: 01 Feb 2007

Oh, Jebus, nononononononono. Worst songs EVER.

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Worst. Advice. Ever.

Papayafan
Posted: January 13, 2009 - 3:19pm
Joined: 12 Apr 2007

People interviewed Gaspy on the topic of this crap music writer/new judge, and he said she was more picky than Paula. Wow Gaspy, that clarifies things a lot, she is like 99.9% of the population and is more picky than Paula. I feel like I know her so much better now.

Scott Baio
Posted: January 13, 2009 - 6:29pm
Joined: 05 Mar 2008

She looks like Mini-McPhee. I've taken shits bigger than her. One of them even came to life and wrote a shitty (literally!) song, and it was still better than the crap that falls out of this little troll on an apparently daily basis. I hope Randy eats her. Cuz he's fat.

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AATFC
Posted: January 13, 2009 - 7:08pm
Joined: 24 May 2008

I didn't like her before, now, I super-sweet-mega-ultra-hyper-saiyan-bleemdonk-dothehokeypokeythenyouturnitallaround-szxdcfvbiuykfuj-don't like her. just seeing that list of shit songs makes me want to eat sharp stuff-from broken glass to katana swords-then puke all of it up until I'm a blood fountain of dead myself.
It's that awful.

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For some reason, I really wanted Jason Castro to sing Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.

Thatswhatshesaid
Posted: January 13, 2009 - 7:24pm
Joined: 12 Jan 2009

Standalone - I think that was from his castrated, Idol-produced album.

nitrozsz
Posted: January 13, 2009 - 7:30pm
Joined: 28 Feb 2008

Wow....what a shitty resume.

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pinkdiva
Posted: January 14, 2009 - 4:33pm
Joined: 14 Jan 2009

you are all just a bunch of haters.

Of all the judges in American Idol, DioGuardi is probably one of the most qualified to criticize and give music tips for the contestants. Kara DioGuardi’s songs have appeared on over 100 million records, including Grammy award-winning artists like Christina Aguilera, Celine Dion, Gwen Stefani, Pink and Santana. DioGuardi’s songs have also been included in the albums of Britney Spears, Jewel, Enrique Iglesias, Kylie Minogue, Marc Anthony, The Jonas Brother, Miley Cyrus, Avril Lavigne and Hilary Duff, among many others.

Do your research haters.

ItsMeDeb
Posted: January 14, 2009 - 4:40pm
Joined: 20 May 2006

Take off your rose-coloured glasses, moron. She blew Cowell and Fuller for the job.

pinkdiva
Posted: January 14, 2009 - 4:43pm
Joined: 14 Jan 2009

i don't care if she blew them at the same time to get the job. she's still qualified and much more so than paula or randy.

ItsMeDeb
Posted: January 14, 2009 - 4:48pm
Joined: 20 May 2006

Sorry, but for as worthless as Paula and Randy are, Kara's a kid compared to them.

Plus, have you even seen her body of work? She fucking wrote "Open Toes" for Katharine McPhee.

Before you go blowing shit out your ass, maybe YOU should do YOUR research, fuckwit.