Final 8 Elimination: Scott Was Jobbed -- Post-Game Analysis

So they had to do it didn't they?  Somehow with the 1-2 punch of Megan and Scott leaving in successive weeks they've sucked the life out of this otherwise mundane season.  Do we really need Gokey AND Giraud hanging around?  They're practically the same goofball.  

Scott is a classy guy, and a brave dude for putting up with all of the bogus Idol shenanigans.  He can return to normal life that doesn't involve enforced whoring in stupid unpaid car commercials, in hilariously tacky lip-synched sing-alongs and in move to this side of the stage.  "Will we save you?  No we won't" emotional tortures.  Screw you Idol.  You're most entertaining contestant is gone.  And Scott's final song was pretty good too.  He reminded us of why we love him.  And he was teasing a stage dive.  That would've been amazing.

Well, that leaves me with 55 minutes of terrible show to talk about.  I'll give it my best.  Here are my random thoughts about the stuff that wasn't very awesome:

-- Frankie Avalon came out to sing "Venus."  I thought he was Frankie Valli until Seacrest corrected me.  That was um, 5 minutes killed effectively.

--  During the awful group-synch Lil looked like she hunted down a disco ball and used it's pelt for a blouse.  

-- I hate how the last couple of weeks the cameras awkwardly cut away whenever Scott did something potentially dangerous and/or hilarious.

-- The Group sing along sounded extra horrible this week, so you know it was finally sung live.

-- The Fnord Whoring was about creepy magicians and glittery eye make-up.  Anoop actually took a stand and refused the make-up, until they made him do it.  Pussy.

-- Just to kill five minutes before they kill the 5 minutes of the Fnord commercial segment they show the behind the scenes of the commercial, which surprisingly were EXACTLY THE SAME SCENES that were in the commercial.  Bravo Idol Producers for tricking me into watching that load of crap twice.  

-- As a bonus, in the car commercial Danny looked like a bigger douche (I know, how is that possible?).   Well, let's say it involves glittery eye make-up and a big-ass shiny white top hat.  You know the costumers figured out he was an asshole so they made him wear that.  And he was PROUD of it.

-- Seacrest: "Who will fill the other stools?"  Isn't this hour-long results show one GIGANTIC stool?

-- Flo-Rida leeches the last ounce of entertainment value out of "Right Round" by Dead or Alive.  Flo-Rida has his ho's with him.  Is that Scary Spice singing the "right round" part?  Seacrest joshes Flo-Rida with: "I like the company you keep."  No you don't.  Don't lie.

-- Flo-Rida gets his website plug bleeped.  Because heaven forbid anybody OTHER than the Idol Producers makes a buck off this schlocky show.

-- Pickler provides the VFTW comedy by wearing a too short mini-dress showing off her anorexic ass and shrilly screeches through a sad imitation of a Carrie Underwood song.  She has no low register and she's nasally and off-key on the rest of the song.  It's as if she's not even trying to sing the song right.  

I imagine this conversation going on backstage between Kelly Pickler and the Idol Producers.

EVIL IDOL PRODUCER: Kelly, what the hell are you doing?  The kids can see up your mini skirt when you're standing on-stage.  This is a family show.

PICKLER:  Ah, shoot.  There ain't nothin' to see.  I never wear panties.

-- After Scott sings for his life Simon reveals that the judges were torn --- 2 for staying, 2 for giving him the boot.  For a second I thought they were going to have him sing another song.  I know, I'm easily fooled.

-- In his going home bio Scott makes a free throw.  Awesome.  

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So that's it.  I'm apathetic.  I don't know what I'm gonna do with the rest of the evening--- Ooh, hey!  Clay Aiken is on Top Model...  See kiddies, if you do really well on a televised singing contest this is where your career can lead you.

Oh, and if you haven't watched my new comedy video, Hardcore Hunting 2 --  you now can see what everyone else is groaning about: WARNING: Foul Language, Adult situations, Disturbing Imagery.

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/d8d308b7a8/hardcore-hunting