Blogs
Post Game Analysis: Semi-Finals Group #2
Well, I'm sober and hungover, but this results show is making me eye my nearly empty bottle of Night Train. This show can drive anyone to drink.
Semifinals Group 2 - Normund Makes Us Love Him
The second group of 12 was at least much more entertaining than the first. But the show still had way too much filler to be good. I’m just glad that we have so many more VFTW possibilities out of this group. Nick Mitchell was epic, and Allison, Adam, and some others definitely make great future VFTW picks if we can’t get our guy into the finals.
Semi-Finals #2: It Takes One To Know One, Sassy Pants -- Extra Schnockered edition.
Idol Semi Finals #2 -- Yawn.
The only way I could get through this week of uninspired singing and dull amateur performances was to mix my own vodka tonics and go for the gusto. Yeah, I'm drunker than Paula, no mean feat that, and I make no apologies. I mean, damn I am TOASTED!!! Yet I'm still not titillated by these singers. Despite countless hours of weeding down the chaff from the grain we STILL have these sucky singers. I mean, how is that possible? Did I mention that I am BLASTED!?!?! I had fun tonight. I don't know about the audience at home, though.
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Results Show #1 -- Post Game Analysis
This is why results shows suck. They are a horrible waste of your life, and nobody should ever watch them. Including me.
The group sing was it's usual brand of terrible. Although Stevie reminded us that she can't carry a tune AT ALL. (How did she make the top 36 again?) And Casey proved to us that she can't sing AND she can't dance. But otherwise, this was dreck.
More recaps of crap we've seen before. One more teasing gasp of Fame to Carly and Michael Johns. By the way, Carly's head looks like it weighs 200 pounds. It's like all the fat in her body migrated to her face. That's all I noticed through the fast forwarding.
Cover songs have long been a staple of karaoke bars, but they are also the ace in the pocket of any great musician. A good cover song is an art form unto itself, and it is an art form the contestants of American Idol are yet to master.
But what makes a good cover song?
First and foremost: it has to stack up to the original, and unless you are covering Britney Spears this can be a formidable task. Posers are lame, so the second rule of a good cover song: put your own spin on it. If we wanted to hear an exact mimic of The Rolling Stones' "Wild Horses," we'd listen to the original. Good covers switch up genres, strip away instruments or utilize a singer of a different gender.
The following are just a few examples of excellent contemporary covers. Idols, pay attention! This is how it's done!
Semifinals Group 1 - "I just sat on the hard part."
So this is the first live Idol show of the year. The time when VFTW really gets started and the unscripted chaos happens. The judges do not call this group the “best ever” because clearly they’re not. But for entertainment purposes, we do have a few standouts.
One person I loved was Jackie Tohn. If it hadn’t been for Tatiana, I would have loved to vote for Jackie. From her crazy purple blazer in her interview to her polka dot top/leggings performance outfit, this girl dresses to make us proud. She’s fun! She jazzes up “A Little Less Conversation” with some growling, dancing, and jumping around, and I bet most people just stared at the screen thinking, “Huh?” I’ve gotta admire someone so quirky. The judges clearly aren’t sure what to say, so Randy says he likes her trousers. Jackie says the trousers like Randy. Simon says that Jackie played the clown tonight and that she blew her opportunity on something silly. That wasn’t silly. That was VFTW. Entertaining and odd. Good on you, Jackie. I only wish you were in a different group from Tatiana. I totally would have supported you. Hopefully Paula convinces the others to bring Jackie back for the wildcard.
Semi-Finals #1: It's Bizarro World Idol
Tonight was Bizarro World night on Idol. Not because Paula's wig was extra frizzy. That's normal.
-Not because Kara was extra horny. I mean, everything out of her mouth was a double-entendre for boning. No, we've come to expect that as well.
-And it wasn't Bizarro night because Simon complimented Ryan on his hair.
-Or that the Idols sang "Songs from the Hot 100... that we've heard a million times before on Idol." No, that's par for the course.
-And it wasn't Bizarro World because the performances were uniformly terrible. Nope, that's just a hilarious bonus.
Unless your name is T.C. Love or Andrea Marvel, chances are the name that adorns your birth certificate won’t sell many albums. The music industry is inundated with stage names. Musicians take up aliases for many reasons: to stand out from the crowd, transition between genres or cultivate an image.
Read the bios below, and (without cheating!) see if you can guess each artist’s more well-known moniker.