What a Difference A Day Makes
AMAZING -- 3 Million Hits over two days!!! We love every single one of you. Even the people that disagree with me.
These observations were written pre-booting on Thursday. They're still valid though.
Girls Sing
Wow. Since AI is a singing contest they should just do away with this nonsense of voting and have a 15 week four-way sing-off between Stephanie Edwards, Sabrina Sloan, Melinda Doolittle and Lakisha Jones. That way we’d have great singing and a true champion will emerge. Well, since AI isn’t actually about the singing then we need the charade of voting and tone-deaf judging, and awful singers hanging around to amuse us. I will say that if one of those four doesn’t win American Idol this year, a serious injustice will have been perpetrated… or VFTW carried Sundance Head to a championship!
I’m using my patented PASS, FAIL grading system but the Furious Four girls immediately jump to the head of the class.
NAME: STEPHANIE EDWARDS
Song: “How Come You Don’t Call Me” by Alicia Keys
As sung by: Aretha Franklin
Funniest Moment: Simon trying to convince Stephanie she should adopt a life of poverty and obscurity by singing more jazz songs from the 30’s and 40’s. Because they’re so fresh and hip. Simon, you’re a boob.
Notes: Stephanie commands the stage and wipes away the crud that was last night’s boys singing. She owns this song and sets the high standard for tonight.
GRADE: Pass - with honors
NAME: AMY KREBS
Song: “I Can’t Make You Love Me” by Bonnie Raitt
As sung by: Amy Krebs
Funniest Moment: The clip from Hollywood when Simon declares “I won’t remember any of you.” And Paula chimes in: “I will. (She checks her paper to remember) Amy.”
Notes: Amy starts off a little flat because of nerves, but she has a pretty voice and doesn’t sing badly. I would say with her gentle voice Bonnie Raitt isn’t the way to go. Randy asks what makes Amy stand out… um, the fact that she’s gorgeous and has amazing eyes? I mean, the four best singers have incredible voices but they’re not exactly FHM material. Paula suggests Amy does something to stand out more… like taking a picture of herself on the toilet, perhaps?
GRADE: Pass – but not in the same league as the Furious Four.
NAME: LESLIE “Dog Walker” HUNT
Song: “Natural Woman” by Aretha Franklin
As sung by: A much whiter Aretha Franklin
Funniest Moment: None. Sadly Leslie is less of a freakazoid than she seemed to be in previous episodes.
Notes: Leslie gives a spirited performance of the song, and she can sing, but her outing wasn’t special. Her enthusiasm outstrips her singing ability as she gives it her all but comes up sounding like a karaoke Aretha. She’s wearing cool boots though.
GRADE: Pass – better than anything the guys threw at us.
NAME: SABRINA SLOAN
Song: “I Never Loved a Man” by Aretha Franklin
As sung by: Aretha
Funniest Moment: None
Notes: Who knew Sabrina was capable of that? Well, who knew who Sabrina Sloan even WAS before tonight for all her screen time she didn’t get. Sabrina gives a commanding, controlled performance and she sings the crap out of the song. I thought she was the best of the night. In the clip package Simon challenged her to sing “the best song ever” to advance, and I think Sabrina made a powerful bid to stick around. Will it work, though?
GRADE: Pass – with honors
NAME: ANTONELLA “Outhouse” BARBA
Song: “Don’t Want to Miss A Thing” by Aerosmith
As sung by: A really bad Aerosmith cover band.
Funniest Moment: Her internet photos posted on this web-site. Or her terrible dress which covers her neck but not her deltoids. She looks like a floating head on a red carpet as she’s singing.
Notes: The song is dreck, the singing of said song is even worse. She’s out of tune on most of it as Antonella effortlessly jumps to the VFTW head of the class, even if her salty internet photos didn’t do that already.
GRADE: Fail – with honors. GO VFTW!
NAME: JORDIN “The Ringer” SPARKS
Song: “Give Me One Reason” by Tracy Chapman
As sung by: A much younger, pretty voiced Tracy Chapman
Funniest Moment: None.
Notes: Jordin does a good AI Performance quality job with her first outing. She sings a simple song well and she hits the high note at the end. She also shows off her stage presence, if only she didn’t steal her hair style from Chris Sligh.
GRADE: Pass – needs to kick it up a notch to contend with the Furious Four, however.
NAME: NICOLE TRANQUILO
Song: “Stay” by Chaka Khan
As sung by: Oddly enough, Chaka Khan
Funniest Moment: Nicole’s scary singing faces with her old woman eyebrow crinkle.
Notes: Nicole channels the voice of a grizzled old black woman for her song. She actually has a strong voice in-between the weirdness. She’s got a lot of energy and verve. Hopefully she hangs around to amuse me some more. (Not gonna happen Professor)
GRADE: Fail
NAME: HALEY SCARNATO
Song: Something by Celine Deion
As sung by: A typical AI contestant.
Funniest Moment: Haley’s ugly Celine-style pants suit.
Notes: If I ruled the world singing Celine Deion would immediately disqualify you from America. With her quivering vocals, her creepy “touch me like this” lyrics and her Trademarked AI glory note at the end Haley positions herself in one of the lower planes of hell. Simon mumbles something about Haley singing like a “reasonably good hotel.” What the hell does that even mean? Usually I can figure out where Simon is going in his own private joke that nobody else gets kind of way, but this one baffles me. This one and the “you’re like a candle” line he told Amy earlier tonight.
GRADE: Fail – I can’t fail you enough Haley.
NAME: MELINDA DOOLITTLE
Song: “Since You’ve Been Gone” by Luther Vandross
As sung by: Aretha Franklin
Funniest Moment: Melinda’s squinty singing face.
Notes: Melinda channels Aretha as she hits the third homerun of the evening. She has a powerful voice and could sing this song in her sleep. She does seem to have some nerves as she keeps clipping the ends of the phrases, but overall a dominant performance.
GRADE: Pass - with honors.
NAME: ALAINA ALEXANDER
Song: “Brass in Pocket” by The Pretenders
As sung by: The world’s hottest pizza parlor girl.
Funniest Moment: The whole performance.
Notes: Alaina’s “make you notice” made us notice she’s badly out of her league on this show. Her performance was a joke and her out of breath singing was a train wreck.
GRADE: Fail – Alaina will probably be back to being the world’s hottest pizza parlor girl on Friday morning. (Not gonna happen Professor)
NAME: GINA “The Ogress” GLOCKSEN
Song: “All By Myself” by Eric Carmen
As sung by: An even bitchier Celine Deion
Funniest Moment: There’s nothing funny about Gina.
Notes: To restate my thesis, people singing Celine Deion is akin to jabbing sharpened bamboo under my fingernails. I can’t stand this dismal song. I can’t stand Gina’s performance of the song. She forgets the words, and her heinous screeching makes me want to take a balpeen hammer to my ear drums.
GRADE: Fail
NAME: LAKISHA JONES
Song: “And I’m Telling You I’m Not Going” from Dreamgirls
As sung by: Jennifer Hudson
Funniest Moment: When they played a slow-mo of Lakisha’s boobs bouncing in the introductions of the show.
Notes: Lakisha makes a loud, boisterous and commanding performance. I’m not sold on her singing this song right before the Oscars. It’s as if AI is trying to bury any residual memories of Jennifer Hudson, except to leech off her success and possible Oscar win. Lakisha proves she can sing, that she can take over the stage and that she’s a performer to contend with, until the fans decide they’re tired of her.
GRADE: PASS –with honors.
That was fun, actually. Even the mediocre girls blew away anything the boys foisted upon us last night. Does that mean a girl is a lock to win AI? Hah! This is Idol, where big personalities trump singing and talent. And don’t forget the power of VFTW.
Thanks to Jenn Brasler’s wonderful American Idol recap on RealityNewsOnline for helping me with the song titles. I’m proudly oblivious to the entire Celine Deion songbook.
Until next week, adios peoples. Remember Vote Sundance and Antonella!!
Chan
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VFTW VICTORIES!!!
Sundance and Antoiletta are safe! This is awesome. If you believe DialIdol, Sundance had the most votes for guys and Antonella was in 2nd for the females behind LaKisha. Thank you SO much to everyone who voted, but don't rest on your laurels. We must vote even harder next week because America will be that much more pissed off. So vote twice as hard for both next week, let's get them to the top 12! (Oh and if you're looking for the Antonella pictures, check out this post and this post.)
VFTW and AOL Television Present: The Top 12 Most Annoying Overdone Idol Songs
We all know that these contestants sing the same damn songs every single year. Thus, VFTW worked with AOL television to create the "Top 12 Most Annoying Overdone Idol Songs" list. Make sure to check it out! Will Stevie Wonder's Signed, Sealed, Delivered top the list? What about that awful Unchained Melody? And how can we forget I'm Every Woman? Find out what we decided to make #1.
Sorry for the Down Time!
There won't be a False Idols this week for the females, and we apologize for the down time on the site! We couldn't anticipate the over three million hits to the entire site we received in just two days, and now we're on a much bigger server to handle the ever growing popularity. Thanks to all who voted for Sundance and Antonella, hope that they're safe tonight! If you have an athena.thinktheweb address in your browser with no graphics on the site, and you can't view the message board, the site is just propogating for you, you'll get the full site very soon 
The Song Remains The Same
Guys Singing
American Idol starts a new season in typical style, with “typical” meaning mundane, average, mediocre. If you’ve ever seen an episode of Idol, then you’ve seen this one. From the boring renditions of boring songs, to the Patented American Idol Goofy Hand Gestures While Singing, to the ogling the camera as it whizzes past to the requisite bad singing. Once again the AI Fashion Team has no idea what actual pop singers wear, opting for “Business Casual” for this episode.
Grading the Idols
Tonight our VFTW job begins. Not that 80,000 hours of crappy singing isn’t “fun” but no, it’s not fun at all. What is fun is listening to the “best singers in America” rise or fall based on dopey musical themes. Where every news program, web-site and fan forum creates “front-runners”, despite the fact that voting starts new each week. Also fun is when fan favorites are sent packing during Sweeps week for ratings.
Grading The Idols is my sarcastic opinion about how the finalists are doing. I don’t have insider information on voting totals or show machinations. I have NO BIAS. I’m an equal opportunity insulter, so if I like certain singers I say it up front, but then beat them down if they suck. For the preliminary weeks I will be using a PASS, FAIL grade for each singer to measure their performances.
I will be using the all-new Report Card System created by Dave, er I mean Professor Chan
Name: RUDY CARDENAS
Song: Free Ride by Edgar Winter Group
As sung by: A finer Miami Beach Cuban drag show
Funniest Moment: Either Rudy’s Kevin Covais pelvic thrusts and gyrations. Or singing a song by this guy--
Notes: Rudy starts off the show with a fruity rendition of a song that was etched into my brain as the Drew Carey Show stripper song… Drew did his version of “Dick in a Box” years before Justin did it on SNL. Rudy’s mealy-mouthed singing renders the song “Fwee A-ide.” Simon says the performance “was not unique.” True, except for Rudy’s other-wordly annunciation.
GRADE: Fail – but a VFTW Candidate if he survives this week.
Name: BRANDON “Muscles” ROGERS
Song: Rock With You by Michael Jackson
As Sung By: A manly Michael Jackson
Funniest Moment: Randy trying to rope Brandon into his world where “pitchy” is a real musical term. Randy: “Being a singer, you know what I mean.” Actually no, Randy, being a singer he has musical training and knows what “off-key” or “out of tune” means. And furthermore, he wasn’t “off-key” or “out of tune” on the song, so he DOESN’T have a clue what you’re talking about.
Notes: Brandon is a good singer but with an unremarkable voice. Maybe the years of back-up singing have leeched the personality out of his singing. Hopefully Brandon can find his personality because he’s likeable.
GRADE: Pass
NAME: SUNDANCE “Richard” HEAD
Song: Nights in White Satin by The Moody Blues
As sung by: Meatloaf
Funniest Moment: Noticing the AI Dressers gave him a t-shirt to cover his forest of chest hair.
Notes: A weird version of a classic rock song. The song is deceptively easy but Sundance found himself exposed on the emotive chorus and bathed in odd blue lights. The lyrics are “white satin” not “blue lights.” This is not Sundance’s fault, but it just shows the Producers are framing him as an out of touch weirdo.
GRADE: Fail – We Love you Sundance… VFTW!!!
NAME: PAUL “Barefoot” Kim
Song: Careless Whisper by George Michael
As sung by: A slightly more effeminate George Michael
Funniest Moment: Paul points to his bare feet when he gets to the “my guilty feet” lyric of the song. Or when Ryan makes a funny and comes to the stage barefoot to show solidarity with Paul. Ryan is growing on me this season. I know, I’m sick.
Notes: Paul displays his reed-thin voice, painful Ace Faces and shrill falsetto. He’s the Asian Ace, and that’s not a good thing.
GRADE: Fail – but I’m rooting for the San Jose Pool Boy.
NAME: CHRIS “K-FED” RICHARDSON
Song: I Don’t Want To Be by Gavin DeGraw
As sung by: Kevin Federline (I don’t care about the spelling)
Funniest Moment: They cut to Chris’ dad boogie-ing down and he looks like Milton from Office Space. Dances like him too.
Notes: Chris says he reminds people of Justin Timberlake, but he’s more on the talent level of K-Fed. His voice is shrill, is personality is off-putting and his nasally singing on this song is painful.
GRADE: Fail
NAME: NICK “Mr. Forgettable” PEDRO
Song: Now and Forever by Richard Marx
As sung by: Richard Marx
Funniest Moment: None.
Notes: I guess Nick is trying to go home with this elevator version of a wussy love ballad. To be fair Nick gives the song a boy band quality and sings it as well as Richard Marx. Or at least that’s what I assume, since I thankfully have never heard the song before.
GRADE: Fail – not bad, but instantly forgettable. Like Nick’s entire stay on AI.
NAME: “Beat Box” BLAKE LEWIS
Song: “Somewhere Only We Know” by Keane
As sung by: Keane
Funniest Moment: None
Notes: Blake was surprisingly not bad. He chose the most contemporary song, showing he’s listened to an album in the last three years, unlike the other singers. Blake shows he’s a confident performer, which will get him far on this show. His high notes and low notes were off, but the stuff in his register sounded nice. He’s not Keane, but then he doesn’t have to be to win this goofy show.
GRADE: Pass – With honors.
NAME: SANJAYA MALAKAR
Song: “Knock Me Off My Feet” by Stevie Wonder
As sung by: Little Stevie Wonder
Funniest Moment: His creepy Ghost Boy from The Grudge face he makes in the Elevator of Shame clip.
Notes: Sanjaya has a pretty voice and sings with poise and confidence. So the judges trash him… for singing Stevie Wonder. Oh stop it already. If they can’t sing Stevie TAKE HIM OFF THE DAMN LIST!!! I’m so tired of this. Sanjaya’s singing highlights his crisp clean vocals, even if the jazz chord changes trip him up. He also sings without the stupid knee swivels that Elliot did when he sang the song last year.
GRADE: Pass – Should be a contender if the judges take their heads out of their collective butts.
NAME: CHRIS “Smart-Ass” Sligh
Song: ???
As sung by: Taylor Hicks, with better tone.
Funniest Moment: Chris declaring solemnly: “Only one of us can sing Do I Make You Proud.” That’s the funniest line of the night, and that includes Ryan’s mocking the 5 frigging hours of Idol this weak.
Notes: Chris knows American Idol and he’s moving down the path to win it. He sings a great AI song, easy verse, shouting sing-along chorus. It’s a crowd pleaser, which is what is required on this show. He’s the Taylor Hicks of 2007. Then he gets the burn of the night by mentioning Simon’s awful boy band and dalliance with Teletubby records. I thought he could’ve saved that for later down the road, but I guess he was afraid of going home tonight.
GRADE: PASS - Chris’ Teletubby reference shows he did his homework. But he doesn’t play well with others, savagely mocking the poor, defenseless Simon.
NAME: JARED “Welcome Back” COTTER
Song: A song by Brian McKnight
As sung by: An adenoidal Brian McKnight
Funniest Moment: He sings a tentative, karaoke version of a pop-lite R & B song.
Notes: Several wrong notes and generic performance should doom Jared (who?)
GRADE: Fail
NAME: AJ TABALDO
Song: Never Too Much by Luther Vandross.
As sung by: A talentless Luther Vandross
Funniest Moment: None because AJ shaved his pubic mustache.
Notes: AJ does a pretty bad Luther Vandross impersonation. His song is typical overwrought “love” and “kisses” and sung with all the passion of a credenza. His falsetto voice is actually an improvement on his singing voice.
GRADE: Fail
NAME: PHIL “Howie Mandell” STACEY
Song: I Could Not Ask For More by Edwin McCain
As sung by: Celine Deion
Funniest Moment: The showers of praise the judges heaped on this steaming pile of poo performance. Or just looking like this guy—
Notes: Phil sings the entire schmaltzy song out of tune. He does the stupid AI indicating with his hands and some Christ-like posing and some weird staring at the camera. This guy is talentless, so of course the judges praise him to the moon. Not Simon, because he’s somewhat sane.
GRADE: Fail – in a sucking chest wound way, not in a funny VFTW way.
Final Thoughts:
A dreary night of mediocre singing, enlivened only by the wit of Chris Sligh and the awfulness of Sundance Head. Apparently “pitchy” is this year’s “pitchy” as that’s the only comment Randy could come up with. Which is one more than Paula who is back to parroting everything Randy says. Paula, if you’re not acting all drunk and skanky you’re wasting space on this show. By the way I looked up “pitchy” and it means “Covered in pitch.” Which is tar. It doesn’t say anything about “Appearing out of tune to a tone-deaf judge.”
Tomorrow: Girls Singing
Top 24 Guys' Round: I <3 Chris Sligh
Finally, it’s time for the voting. And can I say that I love Chris Sligh? I want to have his babies. If that guy would just sing worse, we’d totally be voting for him. He mocks the show, hurls insults back at Simon, and looks like Jack Osbourne. Chris, seriously… I love you. But since you sang too well, tonight my vote goes to Sundance as the VFTW champion for now. How did everyone else do on what I think may be the worst night in Idol history? Obviously… bad.
Rudy Cardenas started the night off wrong with Free Ride. He’s a professional musician, but also a VFTW superstar. Rudy’s performance was just odd. He screamed the song in a really high pitch, did some really odd dancing, and basically came off as the Hispanic Clay Aiken. The hip swivels and the off key notes definitely grabbed my attention and made Rudy a contender for my vote tonight. That had to have been one of the corniest performances in a long while. But no… it’s just not quite VFTW. Close, though. Good try, Rudy.
Brandon Rogers is up next with a passable version of Rock With You. It was pretty boring, but competent. There’s not much to say about it since it was forgettable, but he was one of the better singers.
All of a sudden, the room got really quiet. Folks, it’s time for Sundance Head. Seriously, even if he sang well, having the last name Head just compels me to vote for him. He thought he was going home during Hollywood because he sucked. Instead, the producers kept him around to suck even more in the top 24 for ratings. VFTW thanks them for the noble gesture. Sundance performs Nights in White Satin. It’s so off key and terrible and he’s mispronouncing just about every word. As his sausage link fingers reach out toward the screen, they pull on my heartstrings. I must help him. The judges all hated it and Simon ended it all by saying “I don’t like you tonight.” Well hey, if we can keep him around, Simon can really detest him next week!
Barefoot and wearing his smelly, old underwear, Paul Kim takes the stage to warble Careless Whisper. It’s off key and his creepy tendency to breathe too much is still distracting. The judges weren’t having it. OK, we’re up to the 4th person and they’ve all been average to awful. THIS is the best talent the show could find? Seriously. When they make such a big stink about ,”Yo, dawg, we’re trying to find the best,” and then they put Paul Kim through to the finals, doesn’t that just reek of hypocrisy? Then again, the producers of the show never seemed all that intelligent. Nor do most of the viewers.
Chris Richardson is so excited because his parents are excited. He talks about wanting to be an individual and then sings I Don’t Wannabe Anything Other Than Justin Timberlake. His head bobbing is hysterical, it’s like he can’t keep still so he bounces around in a ridiculous fashion. He looks VFTW, but his vocals are slightly better than the previous singers, so he gets a pass this week. That’s not to say he’s good by any stretch of the imagination. Simon says that Chris sang poorly but that the girls would vote for him. He’s right. The only way to distract the tweentards is to play a Justin Timberlake concert from 10 PM to midnight Eastern right as the show ends, thus causing the tweens to forget to vote. Otherwise, we’re stuck with Chris, and he’ll probably eventually be a VFTW pick.
Nick Pedro bowed out last year, but now he’s back to sing bad imitations of boy band songs. He sings Now and Forever, it’s very breathy and he’s getting ahead of the music. Randy and Paula hated it, but Simon likes Nick and wants him back next week. Kiss of death? I want Nick back next week too because he’s the only real eye candy. This means Nick will be voted out.
Blake Lewis, the resident beat boxer, has decided he’s… WHAT? BLAKE ISN’T GOING TO BEAT BOX? What the hell? I was looking forward to making fun of him for beat boxing inappropriately in a song. What am I supposed to do now? And then he sings Somewhere Only We Know really well, despite a few off key falshitto notes. It’s the first good performance of the night. Damn, I guess I’ll have to save my jokes for later. *files away jokes about MySpace Ho*
Sanjaya Malakar commits an Idol crime: NEVER sing a song that gives the judges ammunition. Stupidly, he decides to sing Stevie Wonder’s Knocks Me Off My Feet, which includes the line “I don’t want to bore you” over and over. His sister picked the song for him, so I have to think she’s probably secretly sabotaging him. Next week she’s going to ask him to sing Smells Like Teen Spirit and he better comply. Who knew Shyamali was a Worster? You go, girl! The judges all say it was a waste of time performance. They’re probably right. Then Simon and Sanjaya compliment each other’s hair and freshly manicured nails.
The man with a plan, Chris Sligh, then totally cracks me up. They actually let someone on the show who will mock it relentlessly. Did I mention that I love him? First, he mocks the fact that the producers had him sing Sweet Home Alabama 30 thousand times, saying he’ll go postal if he has to sing it again. He actually sings pretty well, but Simon hates it. Could it be because Chris mocks Simon’s very existence? Simon keeps throwing out insults “student gig” this, “sweetheart” that, until Chris shoots back with, “Just because I don’t sing Il Divo or the Teletubbies…” SNAP! (For those of you who don’t know, Il Divo is Simon’s shitty boy band and Simon also produced the Teletubbies record). Simon looks PISSED. Chris, keep that up, because in the future, VFTW would love to help see you win to mock the show even more. You were too good tonight for us to vote for you though.
25 year old Jared Cotter is the next piece of cannon fodder in line, as we haven’t seen him sing yet. He sings Back at One and actually does a pretty good job. Yes, it’s slightly boring, but he’s the first contestant of the night who actually sings his falsetto notes on key. Is it even possible to sing falsetto on key during this show? He was far too good for VFTW, but the judges didn’t seem to like it.
Pity party AJ Tabaldo has tried out for Idol 5 times. This kid needs to learn when to give up. He finally makes it on the show and isn’t pimped at all, thus setting up himself to go home in the next 3 weeks. Not that that is his fault, but hey. He says that his Idol experience has been every word in the dictionary: scary, fun, exciting, fake… He sings Never Too Much well enough, but I’m bored with it. He just bounces around a lot.
And last up, we have the untalented Phil Stacy. His wife and little girls are in Hollywood with him, so we’re treated to shots of the wife every 10 seconds during his performance as he butchers I Could Not Ask For More. He still can’t start songs on the correct key, but he did get slightly better toward the end. It was incredibly over the top and ridiculous, but the judges praised him. It’s like Kellie Pickler all over again from last year. Hey, if the judges will compliment his terrible performances, it’ll just help us later. Simon says that Phil is not as good as Daughtry, because all ugly bald men need to be compared to each other. Sadly, his off key performance still wasn’t one of the worst of the night.
So these are the 12 best undiscovered guys in America? Give me a break. Not one of them is a true star yet. As a fun aside, when VFTW started voting for Sundance Head last night, he was ranked 3rd lowest on DialIdol.com (a program that predicts who will go home based on busy signals – it’s surprisingly accurate). By the end of the night, Sundance had received the most votes, according to DialIdol. If this ends up being true, that’s a gigantic VFTW victory. So keep voting! My predictions for who will leave us tonight: Nick Pedro and Rudy Cardenas.
Vote for Sundance right now!
Those of you who want to know Sundance's number- here it is.
1-866-IDOLS-03
Or Cingular customers can text "vote" to 5703.
Though we have to admit, we LOVED Chris Sligh's comment to Simon. But he sang too well. So it's gotta be ManBearPig. So awful, so let's help keep him in!
Story Removed at the request of Tom Lowe
Story removed at the request of Tom Lowe.
More Antonella Barba Pictures: Still the Same Bad Judgement
It seems Antonella Barba loves having pictures taken of her... a lot. And it seems her friends like to put them on the internet. So here are some more pictures we uncovered of Antoiletta, our Porcelain Princess, doing what she does best: apparently drinking, wearing odd clothing, and putting herself in lesbian poses. Hey, we didn't take the pictures, we merely found them! Click on the thumbnails to see a bigger version.
Breaking News: Uh oh, Antonella Barba in revealing poses
Let the train wrecks begin! Now we're not sure where these pictures are from yet, but here are some pictures of American Idol top 24 contestant Antonella Barba found on Bastardly.com in some compromising positions. The picture on your left is a tame version of the actual picture where Antonella seems to be sitting on a toilet ready to do her business. There's also a picture of her topless at the beach. Why did she take these pictures? And can America hate her any more than they already do? Antonella is begging for VFTW votes, so hey, she may be our pick next week. We will see. To see the original pics, click "read more", because they may be too risque for some people.
