OK, I know this is off-topic, but where is the goddamn motherfucking cocksucking shit-eating fantard-crucifying asshole-munching idiot-crunching piece-o-flyblown-scum-scented-shit of a fart-gasping titty-twisting ball-hammering utterly craptastic MAILBAG? I was outta town all weekend. Did I miss it? I need a fix. Dammit.