For those of you joining us for today’s season premiere of American Idol, let us catch you up. We’ve been doing our research for the past few months to bring you the skinny on the plants of American Idol 8. Here’s a who’s who of the usual suspects who will be competing for your votes this year, along with some wilted plants who didn’t make it. Use this like a scorecard so you can check off the forest as the plants appear on the show.

Plants Who Are in the Top 50

Name: Brent Keith Smith

Audition City: Unknown

Why He’s a Plant: He’s already came in sixth place on Nashville Star 2, had music videos played on CMT, and sang the theme song to the movie Dale. That’s a super plant if you ask us.

Name: Adam Lambert

Audition City: Unknown

Why He’s a Plant: Even though we love him (because he’s crazy), he has appeared in The Ten Commandments at the Kodak Theatre opposite Val Kilmer and also collaborated with composer/guitarist Monte Pittman (who has worked with Madonna).

Name: Kendall Beard

Audition City: Unknown

Why She’s a Plant: She was discovered by Grammy winning producer Jeffrey Weber in Los Angeles.

Name: Taylor Vaifanua

Audition City: Salt Lake City, Utah

Why She’s a Plant: She’s a background dancer from High School Musical 2 and was on some local Utah show called Create the Group where she formed a singing group called 4 Real.

Plants Who May Still Be in the Running

Name: Joanna Pacitti

Audition City: Unknown

Why She’s a Plant: After her public rejection from the Broadway play Annie (and subsequent lawsuit), Joanna then had plenty of music business opportunities like singing on the Legally Blonde soundtrack, the Bratz movie soundtrack (and that song was even covered by Britney Spears this year), and releasing a few failed singles while signed to Geffen Records. She's not just a plant, she's a sequoia!

Name: Kristen McNamara

Audition City: San Francisco, CA

Why She’s a Plant: She also came in 6th place on Nashville Star (is this some kind of pattern?) but she was on during season 4. She seems to be a pop singer, meaning she used Nashville Star for publicity, and she has also worked with NSync and Britney Spears producer Chris Trevett. It also seems she got big ol’ titty implants.

Name: Tasha Valentine

Audition City: Phoenix, AZ

Why She’s a Plant: She’s another Nashville Star contestant (10th place during season 1). But since being on the show, she totally butched up and became much more entertaining and fun. Maybe we’ll like her if she makes it far enough?

Name: Jackie Mendez

Audition City: Unknown

Why She’s a Plant: She’s another reject from Kara DioGuardi’s previous failed show, The One, like Syesha Mercado. She was signed to Elektra Records at the age of 17 and performed with Ricky Martin in the past.

Name: Raquel “Sarah” Houghton

Audition City: San Francisco, CA

Why She’s a Plant: She’s Dane Cook’s ex-girlfriend and the lead singer of a band called The Valli Girls. She must be pretty desperate to bang Dane Cook for fame.

Wilted Plants

Name: David Osmond

Audition City: Salt Lake City, Utah

Why He’s a Plant: Duh… the guy is Donny and Marie’s nephew, and he’s the lead singer of Osmond Second Generation. We heard he was cut in Hollywood though. Thank God! This guy would have taken plantiness to a whole new level.

Name: Danielle "Danii" Roundtree

Audition City: New York City

Why She’s a Plant: She’s the current Miss New York USA, and she does an awesome Flavor of Love impression. We think we would have liked her, but she was cut in Hollywood.

Name: Emily Wynne-Hughes

Audition City: Phoenix, AZ

Why She’s a Plant: Her band, Go Betty Go, just finished touring Europe and Emily was just at Quentin Tarantino’s birthday bash. What the hell do you need Idol for then? She was eliminated in Hollywood.

Name: Michael Castro

Audition City: Unknown

Why He’s a Plant: He’s Jason Castro’s brother. Guess Beasty Cash-Ho needed to pimp out another kid for free computers? Luckily, he was cut in Hollywood.

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