It always starts off slowly, but then builds into an unstoppable mass of idiocy. We're referring to Idol fandom. Every year, a group of mentally unstable women lust after a contestant (who is usually gay or already in a relationship) and end up stalking the contestant, the contestant's family members, and basically going batshit crazy. Somtimes, it ruins a person's career (see: Clay Aiken). Sometimes it results in restraining orders and jailtime (see: Diana Degarmo). But in most cases, it's just a bunch of fat, ugly, old women who will stalk your every move and show up all around the country to freak you out and ruin any chance of non-crazy people liking you (see: the entire Idletard website).
Adam, here's just a little preparation for what you've gotten yourself into. The Adam Lambert fans have created an Adam dictionary that defines how stupid they are. Some of the best (worst) entries:
Adamatoepoeia: Any onomatopoeia used when watching/ listening to/ reading about Adam — i.e. groaning because you can never be that sexy (argh), squealing when you see him (squee), etc.
Adamdose: An overdose on Adam. Often brought on by too many viewings of the photo thread.
Lamberlove: That unexplainable feeling of intoxication and addiction we have for Adam.
Lambucks: The coffee you drink in the morning thinking about Adam.
Adam and the Lambert family, this is our warning to you. Hide. Do not let these freaks into your life. And if you do, don't say we didn't warn you.
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nothingtoadd
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 7:44 AM
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Location: everywhere
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Adamtard: Adam fans who come up with an Adam Dictionary.
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KamU
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 7:50 AM
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Adamfatasseswithnolife: Pretty self explanatory.
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magooschmooz
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 7:53 AM
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Location: Memphis, TN
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My goodness What is in the water to have enough time to come up with a whole dictionary. It is not even summertime yet. Adam better recruit the Dykes on Bikes as his security detail when he tours. "I see Crazy Fantards!!!"
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LadyHeather
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 8:00 AM
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Location: Your sweetest nightmares
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Yes, Pet, be adamant with AI and don't let them frak you like this. And when approached by any frauen, palindromically remind them, "Madam, I'm Adam." And flame out tonight to help the rest of us avoid feeling Lambernausea. Too late. I need to drive back to the Lambcave in my Lambmobile and throw up in the Dannium. Then maybe I can take a lie-down on the Adambed, and hold on for comfort to my Adampillow. The only thing that could make me sicker than this is if it were about DWD.
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Mulishass
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 8:03 AM
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Location: The Sticks
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The dictionary is frightening, but, sadly, not that unusual. The funniest one I ever read was from the Soul Patrol. Did you know that Taylor's dick is called a "soul stick" and then he gizzes "soul sauce?" You cannot make this shit up.
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platitudinous1
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 8:14 AM
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Weenrocks
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 8:22 AM
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Dreamcrusher
Location: Down the rabid whole.
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NickSmithervation - what Adam will need to keep these crazy fucks away from his hotel room on the Idol tour.
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JohnnyDrama
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 8:26 AM
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PaPa Fuck B**bs
Location: Locked in a thread! Get me out of here!!
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Pukebucks: The name of my coffee after reading about those tards!
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darwin1981ph
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 8:36 AM
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Location: USA
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He better make pepper spray in handy all the time! Its so creepy, well everything has a price and thats what u get for being famous (for a mean time).
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Lighten Up
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Posted: 4/28/2009 at 8:36 AM
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Damn you Mulishass! Eww lol
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