Adam Lambert Writes Awful Poetry

Posted by thefunnystone on Wednesday, October 14, 2009 at 4:28 PM EDT
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And without further ado, we bring you some original Adam Lambert poetry. What the hell is this guy on? Warning: There may be images in this poem that your brain can't forget.

Dawn.

The ink of night slow dances with muddled fire.

Jagged mountian tops in a breathy mauve peak out of vague camouflage.

A crow moans in horny recovery. Rubbing a last one out amid coconut ghosts and spiderwebs.

This alley cat block still a mystery to me.

On the roof. Seeking proof.

Adam thinks he's edgy and controversial. We think he's an idiot.


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simoncowellabdul
Posted: 10/14/2009 at 4:36 PM Reply with quote

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yuck. awful poetry indeed. how about adam snogging drake, how will the fangirls take this? hahaha

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Smartie
Posted: 10/14/2009 at 4:38 PM Reply with quote
Anorexia Face Location: are they ceiling Lauren fat?? :O

'shrooms or LSD.
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Houdini Splicer
Posted: 10/14/2009 at 5:57 PM Reply with quote

LOL.....This has been around for months and months. Little slow on the uptake eh?
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Pinkpride
Posted: 10/14/2009 at 7:30 PM Reply with quote
Location: In your room, plotting your demise.

It doesn't even make sense.
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empath
Posted: 10/14/2009 at 10:53 PM Reply with quote

he is soooooo stereotypical. and so predictable. does he get off listening to this afterwards?
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dafeedil
Posted: 10/15/2009 at 1:22 AM Reply with quote
Location: Vulva worm

Ooooooh, he's sooooo edgy and so controversial. He's a fucking moron. First of all, how in the bloody hell does a crow go about "rubbing a last one out"? It's a crow, with wings and no visible genitalia. I'm assuming it's a really deeply metaphorical "poem". Madame is the crow (because crows are black and greasy and are extremely obnoxious), he masturbates A LOT, the coconut ghosts and spiderwebs are the socks and Kleenex he uses to splooge in. I imagine poor Madame spent a good bit of his fat ginger years rubbing ones out. The rest of it is just too fucking stupid. Poetry is supposed to make you feel something deep within, and that's exactly what this twaddle is doing to me. Now, if you all will excuse me, I think I must go vomit now. If ANY of you tards or frau can make ANY sense of this crap, why don't you let me know what deep and edgy meaning it's supposed to have.
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TheMuffinMan
Posted: 10/15/2009 at 2:15 AM Reply with quote
Location: Michigan

He lost me at "crow".

What a bizarre poem. Can you even call it a poem? That might be insulting to the countless other writings that are actually formidable and insightful.

Oh, &; saying that it's abstract and for the reader to understand is code for "Yeah, I don't know what the fuck it means either."
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BelCantista
Posted: 10/15/2009 at 5:26 AM Reply with quote
Location: Houston, TX

So now we know it, he is still on drugs. Probably crystal meth which is the gay drug of choice. That would explain his disgusting skin, he must have a couple of creepy crawler under his skin type of hallucinations and left his skin looking like the surface of the moon.

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manlambda
Posted: 10/15/2009 at 5:31 AM Reply with quote
Location: Maryland

I'm going to be in the minority and say I like it except the horny crow part. Sounds like stuff my hubby used to right in the old days in acid. In fact my favorite by him was titled Concrete Is Not Sweet.
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crazytom
Posted: 10/15/2009 at 6:28 AM Reply with quote
Location: Farmington MI

Read it again, but this time imagine him singing it. Start off slow and breathy in the begining, then start shreiking and holding long notes at the end. Scary, huh?
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