We did it, Worsters! 132 million votes were cast last night, and in the end, we helped the fifth straight white guy with a guitar win American Idol. It seemed daunting at the beginning of the season, but we succeeded yet again and helped make sure Pinoybot Jessica Sanchez was left in the loser's circle. Apparently the curse of Kristy Lee Cook is even stronger than we thought - her horse must be laughing his way through the glue factory.
The guy who chewed gum on stage. The guy who gave Ryan Seacrest bunny ears every chance he got. The guy who didn't care about the songs he picked. The guy who didn't listen to Tommy Hilfiger. The guy who sang the same way every single week. The guy who multiple times on stage said that he couldn't sing as well as everyone else. He is our American Idol. Yes, he is. And we helped him achieve that goal. The cherry on the cake is that he's going to miss a lot of the tour due to his health problems - the winner of season 11 won't even be on most of the tour! The tour's booking manager must be furious.
Check back next year, when we help #wgwg6 win the show. If you are a wgwg, you must try out for the show and we will make sure you win.
If you'd like to send us love mail for helping kill this show with #wgwg5, you can e-mail us, post on Facebook, or tweet us.
And make sure you bid on the official VFTW American Idol caricatures. Now that Phillip has won, his caricature is a real collector's item!
EDITED TO ADD: #wgwg5 is trending on Twitter in the US and White Guy With Guitar is trending Worldwide. The vocabulary we make up is taking over the world.
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Legend
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:06 PM
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Yay!!! Well done, well played, kudos all around!
WooooHoooo!!!
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blooncrazy
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:06 PM
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Location: Indianapolis
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132,000,000 CERTIFIED votes?
What a steaming pile of crapfest this shit is! Can it really continue?
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smarterthanpickler
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:07 PM
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Administrator
Location: Lazaro's Pants!
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VFTW: 1
Philippines: 0
 #wgwg5
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insufferablepj
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:09 PM
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Location: Michigan
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Congrats to all Worsters! WGWG#5!
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Miamifinz
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:10 PM
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Location: Clearwater, FL
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Hilarious. Please, tell us how you feel Pinoy pride
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BillB
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:11 PM
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Philip wasn't the worst. Jessica was. Why didn't you viote for her? You guys are stupid.
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Riddle_Me_This
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:11 PM
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Quote "blooncrazy": 132,000,000 CERTIFIED votes? What a steaming pile of crapfest this shit is! Can it really continue?
What the hell are you alluding to here? It was clear when they played the debut single BB Chez had a lame song.
Plus Phillip Phillips is a far more MARKETABLE choice than an anorexic teen balladeer.
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nyyhec
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:11 PM
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Location: Yonkers, NY
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WORSTERS!!! Have I told you lately that I love you?!?!? LOL!!! Amazing win. Congrats to you all!!!
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kcostell
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:12 PM
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Location: Georgia
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Currently trending on twitter: Phillip Phillips, #americanidol, #wgwg5, and Lee Dewyze 
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Whatchamacallit
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Posted: 5/23/2012 at 10:13 PM
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UNF**KINGBELIEVABLE!!!
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