You're forgetting:

11. You have no influence on the results.

12. You guys are getting the good people kicked off.

13. You won't have the guts to print my letter.

14. You must be gay.

I love all the emails that end or begin with "I know you won't have the balls to print this on your site." I'm going to start putting that in my emails because mine never make it to the mail bag.

Don't you love it when the trolls get all philosophical and Zen on us?

We have Worster Zen which is far funnier than plain old Zen. Forgiveness of self is step 1 which we mastered eons ago. We're at the place now where we have to show the learned ones our fathers' face before we were born.

Good news is it looks like Dave.

Magooish

While those are also definite touchstones of your average Mail Bag horrorshow, I didn't include them here because I was only referencing the last letter, which did not mention those things.

You should be ashamed of yourselves for stealing spots from really talented people , but what can you expect ,only a bunch of low lives can think about things like this instead of making something to better our country , way to go america,what a great future we have.

-Silefer

I'm sorry; I lost you at "really talented people."

OMG...I cannot believe all the idiots out there who sit there and actually take this so called "show" "American Idol" seriously!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kids in elementary school don't even take their cartoons this seriously when they watch them!!! Wow, this is really sad, but oh so funny, I just sit here laughing until my stomach hurts listening to such lame ass people say over and over.."you've ruined American Idol for me!!! it will just never be the same again!!!!! how could you do this???" or arguing over the contestants how even though one is just as bad as the next one, they still sit here and take up for them. Uhh...reality check to the people who watch American Idol and think it's the most important thing on earth...it's not like you're ever going to meet these contestants. Who cares if they are voted off or stay another week?? And even if you do happen to run into them one day, it's not like they are going to give you any of their benefits. I stopped caring about this loser show last year, and got a kick out of the Sanjaya scenario. I knew it had all got to pot when I saw that little ole girl in the audience just sitting there crying her freaking head off over Sanjaya singing, when there was nothing to cry about, and it was just as fake as you could get. This year is an even bigger joke because everything is so boring on it, I can't stand to just sit there and sit there watching one menotenous singing escapade after another, and Ryan constantly itching like mad to go to commercial breaks. Please. I have waaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy better things to do with my time than just sit there and watch something that I don't give a shit about in the first place. I've found it easier and much more entertaining to look on here after the performances, and read how everything went, and then who got voted off. I think you guys rule. You are awesome, and totally crack me up. This site has brought me more entertainment than American Idol has brought in the last 6 seasons. I think the hate mail that you all get is too funny for words. Keep it up cause those of us out here who can't stand even the mention of the name of this show definately need the laughs...

you mean you would drink after her?? lol still pretty funny though...I just wouldn't put my mouth on anything that Paula's has touched...eeeeiiisshchhhkkkk

P.S: Carly isn't going to go anywhere anytime soon.

-Gregory

Ummm, guess not.

Ugh, some people rant about how uninfluencal this site is. It's annoying when it's followed by a rant about how this site kicks the good people off. I wish all "haterz" would get together, and decide if this show does anything or not. Or better yet, not read things that offend them.

"All really need to get a life bad all are the reason why people think idol is rigged i seen on msnbc where all vote for people like sundance until he imporved stupid motherfuckers..." Use a comma, jack ass.

"...why would you make fun of someone for being a douche when you are one yourself?" Does insulting a douche who insults a douche make you a douche?