You know you're washed up when...

That shit needs a warning label. Well at least it pushed flyspecked drooling ManBoobies down and nearly off the page. Not a total loss.

And THAT'S how I beat Shaq.

Poor Aaron Carter. He's just had some tough times lately, that's all. He'll be back, I just know it! I remember the day I first bought his album Aaron's Party (Come Get It), I knew that I was witnessing the birth of a truly special talent, one that would redefine music as we know it and give voice to a new generation.

How unprepared I was for the giant creative and intellectual leaps forward that young Mr. Carter would take to deliver his second album, 2001's Oh Aaron. Gone were the innocent covers of Aaron's Party, replaced now with original tunes that extolled the hardships of growing up white and rich in America. Carter announced his newfound maturity with a masterful musical flourish on such tunes as "Baby, It's You", "I'm All About You", "The Kid In You", and "Hey You".

Then, in 2002, just a few years after this mysterious virtuoso burst upon the scene, Carter would stun the world by releasing his most accomplished and groundbreaking record to date, Another Earthquake. Combining a range of influences from the likes of superstars Nelly and Limp Bizkit, Aaron took these familiar sounds and created something wholly new to the world of popular music. Songs such as "My First Ride" and "Do You Remember?" showcased a much more mature and experimental side of Carter, and the album would go on to influence every single musical genre that came after it. With the release of Another Earthquake, Aaron Carter cemented his name in the annals of history with the likes of other musical geniuses like Elvis Presley, John Lennon, and Johann Sebastien Bach.

After Another Earthquake literally inspired world peace and cured hunger and AIDS in Africa, Carter decided to take a hiatus from the music industry. As can happen with so many musical prodigies, the time away began to take its toll on Carter. With no direction in which to channel his massive musical and intellectual ability, Carter turned towards drugs, women, and sharing the company of various hangers on, such as Blake Lewis, that hoped to siphon just a little bit of that creative energy for their own personal gain. It is indeed a dark time for young Mr. Carter, but with the help of a loving fanbase, surely he will be back to deliver another inspiring and majestic musical tour de force. Until then, Aaron, you will never leave my prayers. God speed, young genius!

Scott Baio, I don't think I'll ever be able to convey to you how much I love you.

lol, Ravenwood. Shaq is a better singer and performer than that fafu.

I'm getting in line with ya Tinnerz....seriously - who's the genius again Scott Baio? T and I know it's you. ;)

Tell me when this is over...I seriously want to run my fingernails down a chalkboard, noise seems more pleasant than Blake's poor excuse of a talent.

Scott Baio,

You're talent goes beyond any of us! Even to Blake's! Actually, a dog yelping and screeching has more talent than Blake's.

But we won't go in that direction today.