It's time for the Top 9 to sing, which brings good news and bad news. The good news is that we're already halfway through the season. The bad news is that the first half of the season felt like a full season usually does, and we still have half a season to go. Unfortunately, after last week, most of the contestants *coughHEEJUNcough* have gone back to being boring as watching paint dry. No, make that as boring as watching dry paint slowly fade from being exposed to the elements over a period of several years or more, so expect a very long nine weeks ahead. Yes, nine weeks. Remember, there was already a double elimination, so expect the save to be used in order to buy another week at some point down the road.

It's another Wednesday night, and thanks to the continual two-hour episodes, that means another Wednesday evening is totally shot. Tonight's theme is the music of Billy Joel. Let me tell you a little story about this. I grew up on Long Island in the 1980s. Billy Joel was a hometown hero and was worshipped like a god there. So much so that our high school video yearbook's theme song was "We Didn't Start The Fire". In fact, I owned several Billy Joel albums and knew most of his songs, and that didn't even make me that much of a fan by Long Island standards. With that said, I'm going to predict that Long Island will offically hate American Idol after tonight.

Tonight also marks the debut of Tommy Hilfiger as the show's "style" consultant. If the definition of 'style' is tacky clothing made in third world warehouses that also double as death traps, then this is an accurate description of Tommy Hilfingerbang. Yes, that is what I am calling him, because to do so is more amusing to me than 99% of this season has been so far.

Tonight's mentor is Diddy. Yes, Diddy. Isn't that who you think of when you think of 1970s-80s suburban rock? This should be good. And by 'good', I mean 'a train wreck, VFTW style'.

Tonight's theme is songs from the years the contestants were born, years that range between 1983 and 1995. Ah, the eighties and nineties. Not only do they represent the birth years of the Top 12 11, but each decade represents important times in pop music history. During the 80s, New Wave/Electronica, Rap/Hip-Hop, and Heavy Metal revolutionized American music and culture. In the early 90s, Rap/Hip-Hop matured and established itself as a solid genre, and three musical pioneers known as Nirvana changed the face of rock with a new sound known as Grunge. Heady times indeed.

However, this is American Idol, so we will hear none of this tonight.

The show starts with Ryan explaining that some information has surfaced that will cause one of the Top 12 to be eliminated on the spot. He says that anything can happen during a live show. Anything, that is, except something interesting, based on how this season has gone so far.

It's time for the first finalist performance show! I was very excited over this, because this is the stage where, during most years, the contestants were awkward and nervous in new surroundings, making for some awesome train wreck performances. As the show starts, we see Ryan, the Top 13, and the judges sort of dancing to Stevie Wonder's 1966 classic "Uptight (Everything's Alright)". It's a fun, peppy song, so everyone's getting hyped up, not knowing that this would turn out to be the most fun moment of the night.