Adam Lambert

After seeing Adam Lambert's hilariously ugly album cover (see the post below this one), the Sparkle Cows are producing some hilarious reactions. While you laugh at arguably the worst Idol album cover of all time, also laugh at these comments from Adam's fans from his official website:

"I don't like it at all! he looks like a woman! no, no, no....very dissapointed..."

"Is this REALLY the cover? Of all the gorgeous pictures Adam has taken, I can't undertand why this was selected for his debut album...he looks like a woman, not the handsome man he really is. I'm so disappointed!"

"You wanted contraversy, well you got it! This is way to femine for me too. Is it air brushed? Are you naked? You are holding you face as a woman would. All that is good about this, is that it is not the Michelin Man suit! That doesn't look like a Rock God. I still love your singing, your personality, and those other looks."

"Okay...honestly...I LOVE Adam...I really do...but why so femmy?! It's like a bad Cher photo shoot from the 80's! WOW. Just...WOW."

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OH MY GOD! BREATHE... BREATHE... CAN'T HELP IT... *dies of laughter*

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Looks like Adam is going to be performing at the American Music Awards this year. Hopefully the venue's security has extra Twizzlers on hand to herd the Sparkle Cows. (Via MJ's Big Blog)

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Time For Miracles

Adam Lambert | MySpace Music Videos
The soot all over his face suits him, since is covers up his nasty skin. If the world ends and everyone dies, can Adam go with them?

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The story we'd already linked to last week from Details Magazine is now available online. It's even more pathetic than we imagined. The tagline to the article is "Why does every woman in America want to sleep with the American Idol?" Ladies, we'll let you respond to that one. Adam is still trying to pretend he likes to make out with women sometimes so that he can sell records to the Sparkle Cows. Dude, grow a backbone. He also mentions that he likes his men "smaller and younger." Direct quote. The funniest part of the article is the ad on the side where you can enter to win your very own photo shoot with Adam Lambert. The pictures resulting from a Sparkle Cow engulfing Adam should be a VFTW victory of massive proportions. Pun intended.

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Amazon.com confirms it. It should more appropriately be named For Your Amusement, as we'll probably be laughing when it fails.

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Rickey.org has a funny post up with some gossip about Adam Lambert. Apparently, this summer on the Idol tour, Adam Lambert experienced the real meaning of the word tragedy. Someone grabbed his hand while his nail polish was still drying, and then...

Lambert exploded in a full diva meltdown and shrieked: “What the %%$#@&… my nails are still wet!”

He then waved his newly smudged, black-lacquered nails for all to see, adding, in a shriek: “Look what you have done! Now I have to do them all over again.”

The poor stagehand apologised profusely, we hear, as Lambert stormed back to his dressing-room.

Probably true. Adam seems incredibly into himself, so this all seems about right.

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AINow has the pictures from Adam Lambert's photo shoot in Details Magazine. Adam described the pictures as "racy" in a Twitter post. Why is he posing with a naked woman? It just seems kind of desperate. It's not as it if it's saying anything or even that interesting. His album must be turning out really awful.

ETA: Details Magazine wasn't too happy with them having the pictures up, so you'll have to actually get the magazine. If you plan to assault your eyes.

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