Constantine Maroulis
Constantine Maroulis Gets His Ass Kicked
The Tony Awards Lose All Credibility
Everyone's least favorite douche, season 4 American Idol loser Constantine Maroulis has been nominated for a Tony Award. Seriously? Constantcrap is nominated for Best Performance by a Leading Actor in a Musical for his role in Rock of Ages. As if no one cares about the Tony Awards before, now they're making sure that no one will watch the Broadcast this year. Since Constantine cannot act and cannot sing, it might be funny to watch anyway to see him lose and throw a Kanye West style fit. (No picture of Constantine will accompany this article as we do not want site readers to lose their lunch)
American Idol Trading Cards? Seriously?
Because American Idol wants to steal more money from kids, Fremantle has partnered with Upper Deck to put American Idol contestants on a new series of trading cards, available April 21. There are 138 cards in all. Cards will probably include a scratch and barf Constantine Maroulis, a much smaller than real life Jorbacca Sparks card (so the card wouldn't have to weigh 10,000 pounds), and a Jason Castro card that steals your money while you sleep. but we think the Paula abdul card (left) is a gross misrepresentation. Where's the slurring? Where's the vodka? Where's the ridiculous outfit? Worsters would obviously create a much better deck of cards, so post yours in the comments if you come up with anything better.
Constantine Maroulis Plays a Free Library Show
It's as tragic as it sounds! Idletard has a video up of Constantcrap playing a free show at the Toms River, NJ Library. So many easy jokes. But the best part is that the crowd is full of the 10-20 frauen who still find him interesting... and that's it. Maybe he can clean their dentures when the show's over?
Rock of Ages Cast on Conan O'Brien
Corny and awful. The Rock of Ages cast stopped by Late Night with Conan O'Brien. And if it wasn't bad and corny enough already, resident greaseball Constantine Maroulis screams out an incredibly out of tune high note at 3:40. Only watch it if you're a true masochist.
Constantine Maroulis Greases Up the Stage With "Crap of Ages"
Poser Constantcrap and talks to Fox News about his new musical, "Rock of Ages". Cumstainedteeth still hasn't changed, complaining and looking as greasy and pathetic as ever. Wonder when this musical will be canceled?
Constantcrap's Trailer for Rock of Ages
Constantine is appearing in a new musical called Rock of Ages. And well... just watch this teaser video and laugh along with us. And at least this means we will have ample opportunity to mock Constantine and his creepy frau fans as they come back out of the woodwork.
And Even Less Loved...
OK, so we overexaggerated on the last story. Constantine has work... in Desperation Tour 2008! Actually, it's just 4 American Idol finalists singing Christmas songs on December 3rd at the State Theatre in Easton, PA. The desperate out-of-work Idols who will be performing there are Constantine (ugh!), Kimberly Caldwell (double ugh!), David Hernandez (who?), and Diana Degarmo. Seriously, Diana. We don't even care that much about you but you can definitely do better than this group of desperate wannabes. Drop out and let someone truly pathetic take your place... like Carly Smithson. Thanks to MJ's Big Blog for the tip!
Anyone who punches Constantine is a friend of ours. We don't care that Constantine was defending Paula Abdul. The guy is just reprehensible and deserves it.