Prof. Chan's Grading the Idols
Final 7... Again: Post-Game Analysis
Final 7: Disco Duds
Maybe someone can explain this to me... Why do the Idol Producers bother with these stupid genres if nobody is ever forced to sing a song IN that style of music. For example, the theme this week was Disco music, and although all 7 Idols picked disco songs by disco artists none of them sang it in a disco style. Well, except for our precious Lil who still doesn't get this show. Anyways, my point is if the Idols are forced to sing a song from a particular genre, half the fun is watching them stink while singing in that particular genre. Ever since Daughtry showed the Idols how to buck the system these gleefully stupid Idol theme weeks haven't been the same.
Final 7: Post Game Analysis
They wasted their save on Mac Tonight?!?!?
"A sneak at Matt Giraud in his future occupation."
Simon: "The first piece of bad news... two people go home next week. Second piece of bad news... Next week is Disco Week."
Have two more awesome lines been spoken on American Idol? I wish they could send two people home every week. And as for Disco, is there a more maligned genre of music that will destroy any shred left of these Idols' dignity and integrity?
I say... Bring on Disco Night.
Final 7 -- Movie Mega-Cheese*
Soporific 7 -- Movie Mega-Cheese*
*Also the title of Mike from MST3K's book about horrible movies, the EXACT kind of movies that are represented tonight.
Final 8 Elimination: Scott Was Jobbed -- Post-Game Analysis
So they had to do it didn't they? Somehow with the 1-2 punch of Megan and Scott leaving in successive weeks they've sucked the life out of this otherwise mundane season. Do we really need Gokey AND Giraud hanging around? They're practically the same goofball.
Final 8: Scott Leaps Off The Stage... Vocally
8 Singers left. This is when the show gets good. Down to one hour shows. The singing is competent. And the Idol Judges look like idiots for continuously praising Gokey even when he sucks.
Actually the show isn't quite an hour. More like an hour 10 as the Producers have an unnatural obsession with having stupid judge conversations, pointless Seacrest chats with contestants, excessive baby photos and random shots of creepy "Fringe" Dude in the audience.
Final 9: Post Game Analysis -- We miss you already, Megan. Caw! Caw!
36 million votes? Which of the 8 remaining singers inspires that kind of loyalty now that our Songbird has Flown away?
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This was an action packed Results show, yet it still felt like it was treading water. These things are so long and pointless. Oh, and on last night's "Law and Order: SVU" they call Seacrest the Devil. Awesome. For a show that spends an awful lot of time thinking up new ways to present rape they're pretty astute writers.
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Singing tonight, Lady Gaga. And next week a duet from Ms. Goo-Goo and Dr. Poopy-pants.
Tonight's Group-synch is a Cheeseriffic "Don't Stop Believin'" Journey sing-a-long. It sounded good which just proves that Journey is indestructible.
Final 9: I-Tunes Whoring Episode
Final 9: ITunes Whoring Episode.
We are repeatedly told by Seacrest that this week involves something about I-Tunes, but I can't figure out what. Basically it comes down to that the contestants can pick any famous song they want (as long as it's cleared by the parsimonious producers.) The "Pick Any Song You Want" episode is always good for a few laughs, because we realized how delightfully out of touch each of the Idols are, and how far from being contemporary recording artists they are.
And in the opening video montage I see that Gokey has man-boobs.
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Anoop -- "Caught Up" by Usher
Finally an eventful results show, not only because we eliminated two dead-weight singers, but also because... No, that's really the only reason, chucking a couple anchors overboard. If the Producers really want to improve Idol for next season they should eliminate 10-20 singers every week. I'd watch.
Lil is unceremoniously dumped after no drama at all. That was cold-blooded. Now with our beloved knife-fighter Lil gone I feel... Sorry, what was I talking about again? Anyhow, Lil sings her disco song again and she's terrible, again. Â